Chilly morning. The coffee becoming quickly cold in my hands. Some days, it's hard to resist the temptation to jump ahead of myself, dream of warmer days, sunnier days, brighter days.
My soul closes in itself when the winter has outstayed their welcome. I want to become silent and quiet like the snow. I want to roll myself into a small ball like a hibernating wild animal. But I'm human, and my humanity screams at me. Being human means I can't be content with just existing and letting the seasons past by me, sheltering when it's cold, stretching in the sun when it's warm.
Being human means I have this will inside me, to explore further, to understand, to feel, to create, to love, to express myself, to have a purpose. To dream. To feel everything so deeply.. Being human means feeling all extremes in a way it becomes nearly overwhelming sometimes.
I try to focus my mind. I try to fill it with inspiration, creating. I try to find a path that leads me from this place of wanting to curl up in a ball, to a place of turning that into shapes, colours, expression. I try to colour my mind, when nature all around still remains grey, so grey and cold......
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